What a week...

Monday morning: Kids had appointment with counsellor at 10am. At least they got a sleep in. Hospital rang at 9.20 to say that W was being transferred to Brissy and if we wanted to say goodbye we should head straight in. So we do, via Hungry Jacks for breakfast (had promised the kids a treat). Get to hospital to say that he was at the airport. Ring the counsellors and say we will be late. Head to the airport. He is there with his 'guard' (his words) who is a psych nurse. The kids didn't really know what to say. J was hyper. Miss I was not very talkative for once. Neither was W.

I rang that afternoon and discovered he had arrived safely. Also called in at Centrelink to find out my options. Basically none as we are still together even though he is in hospital. His option is to forgo Austudy and go onto sickness benefits. I think both payments are similar amounts.

I managed with work and the kids this week, finishing two days at 6pm. Both nights friends picked the kids up from school and ended up feeding us. They are a couple W married and she has a daughter at the kids school.

On the work front... Two contracts were advertised during the week, but both in departments I am not that keen on. One is for 35 hours/week, the other 20. I asked someone in personnel about any other contracts and she said there were two coming up in electrical, one for around 30 hours, but every weekend and the other for a few less hours but every second weekend. I am going to put in for the second one. I will go back to getting a top up parenting payment. It will be tight, but with one (large) less mouth to feed should be manageable in the short term. This would also give me time to write my thesis. The other rumour is that there will be a team leader position going in electrical which would be a full-time contract (38+ hours/week). When something happened during the week and I quipped to one of the senior managers some of the deficiencies in the electrical department and how they need to be fixed, I was told (in a joking way!) that I should be the team leader. This was before I heard of the possibility of there being a team leader position. I will wait and see what happens. There is someone in the department (who lots of people have issues with!) who has a gripe with me, but she won't tell me what it is even after I have asked her straight. So I am letting it go and I know she is the one with the issues.

Tuesday I caught up with both R and my GP. R was great and reminded me that the kids are involved and affected and that is why I am doing what I am doing. GP was good too. He listened and said that time apart might be good. He told me I need to exercise every day. He doesn't have 2 kids to look after! At work I walk around a lot. I might get out my 'Walk away the Pounds' DVDs and get up early to do them on work days and on non work days go for a walk when they are at school. We also talked about my anxiety, which has increased over the last few weeks. I told him I had taken a valium at work and that it had made my legs jelly like, but overall a great feeling for the afternoon! We talked about previous times I had been on antidepressants and the side effects (weight gain mainly) and how I really didn't want that again. So we decided that for the next few weeks I should try half a valium twice a day as needed. I did that Thursday and Friday morning at work and it really helped. I was skeptical, but amazed and didn't need the other half a tablet that day. This is not a long term thing, but only for a few weeks as required. I did try rescue remedy one day at work too, but it was not as effective. I then dropped the $20 bottle on the floor and it smashed so I am not rushing out to get another one!

I have spoken to W a couple of times during the week. Yesterday morning he rang just before the kids left for school wanting to talk to them. He then told me that the dr had said he will reassess his release at the end of next week. I was pretty shocked and rang the nurses later in the morning. They said there was nothing in his notes. I told them he was still sounding down on the phone. So I rang him back last night and told him that he would not be welcome back here when he was released. He sounded shocked and again told me what an awful person I am and that he hasn't broken vows and he wants to be with me for life. I said he needed to sort something out. He told me he was not going to ring again and if the kids wanted to speak to him they could ring. He also told me he was living a dead life without his family. Usual melodrama from him. I told him to talk to the staff there.

SIL rang this morning and said BIL wanted to speak to me. They are having the kids tomorrow and going to a crocodile farm. They are also taking my car. I think I am ok with this. I rang back this evening and had a bit of a chat and she was glad I had stood up to W. MIL is looking around for somewhere for him to live up here but she is appalled at the rent prices.

I took today off work and we did some tidying around the house and some washing. Kids both started on their rooms- enough to change the sheets at least! They both thought it was like Christmas finding treasures that were under their beds etc! As a treat, tonight we went out for gelati in town. They loved it and it was nice to do something together.

I am about to hit the sack. Will try and report in more frequently, but it is hard. I am contacting Centrelink again on Monday, after my massage (some of my bestest friends sent me some money instead of flowers and I am having a massage with it and then having take away sometime!). Centrelink will really please W! But it is beyond him now.

Life is definitely interesting I suppose!